Strong men foster strong relationships. I often hear women ask how to make their partners more emotional. Why is it up to the women in our lives to carry this burden? Let's do the work here, guys! Being strong means you can have the tough talks...you can be brave enough to be vulnerable and you can face your fears in your relationship with respect and compassion. Sharing feelings, hopes and dreams is actually harder than not. It takes strength to share.
Did you know that great apes even have issues at midlife? For us homo sapiens, research shows that midlife issues begin in our early 40's. Forget the jokes...the goofy movies...the convertibles...this stuff is for real. Midlife is fraught with disappointment, lack of fulfillment, loss of hope, etc. It has also been shown that if you don't have a second or complementary career going by 45, you will never change. Knowing that this is all normal is the first step. Let's do the work to get through it in healthy and positive ways.
Think about a well-visit for a child. Even when kids are healthy, doctors recommend children periodically go in for a check up, preventative care, or at certain developmental stages to keep them as healthy as possible. Couples coaching is a well-visit for a relationship. It's a time to do preventative work to strengthen your connection, tackle minor issues when they first come up, and provide support at various life stages that put strain on the healthiest of couples (newly married, new parents, new job or town, empty nesters, etc).
Like everything else in life, your career is all about managing and building relationships. Regardless of your title, you are in relationship with your boss, your co-workers, your employees, and your clients/customers. Just like in your personal life, these relationships take work and they can make or break your career. With over twenty five years of leadership experience, I have seen it all...the good...the bad...and the really freakin' ugly. Chances are, at some point in your career, you will need someone to talk to. I am here to help you with issues like leadership development, motivation, conflict and dissatisfaction, career transition, and managing change.
MAKE THE TEAM
For most part, when you're younger, making friends seems to come easy. You quickly bond with the other kids in your class and those who you are around the most...not much effort is required to create these connections. As we get older, those opportunities for spontaneous friendships to form become fewer and farther between. But, the need for friendship with others remains.
Compared to others, the human brain is a big one. Researchers propose it needs to be large to carry out the social functions that humans perform. SO our brain is literally designed for relationship. But, the average person in the United States has only one close friend, and one in four people have zero friends. It is also true that seventy five percent of people say that they are unsatisfied with their friendships that they do have.
Truth be told, isolation leads to connecting to things that aren't necessarily good for growing into a flourishing state. For me, that thing was alcohol, but for others it could be their job, money, power, porn, etc. Relationships are an essential part of your journey to well-being. Making the team means being matched with 2 or 3 same sex, like-minded individuals with the goal of building relationships while working on the other elements of well-being including positive emotions, engagement, meaning, and achievement.
WORK AND FAMILY
After returning to work from three months off of being with my first newborn son and wife after delivery, something surprising happened. In the first couple of weeks back, I had three male colleagues visit me. They all said the same thing, "I had no idea that men could take time off to be with their wife and newborn.” Research shows that both women and men report similar levels of work-family conflict, but sadly we don't get that message in the media, through public perception, or corporate culture. This time that I got with my family was so important...so special. I want to help you navigate these waters. I want you to have these bonding times together. I want to help you have a better balance in life.
I have been teaching, advising, writing with, mentoring, and serving as a substitute parent for college students just like you for over 20 years. I was also a college student myself for 10 years...hell...I'm a college student right now. Point is, I have been in a college setting since 1988 and I have a HUGE space in my heart for college students. Honestly, there is very little that I can't help you with. I am here to help guide you through career/major selection, job hunting, relationship building, motivation problems, dating, and so much more, Worried about working with me? Check out what your colleagues have to say about me on rate my professor!